Nine Reasons to Love Withers Street

9. If you can't get to the beach, you can listen to cars on the BQE and pretend it's the ocean.
8. If you can't get to the beach, you can watch cars on the BQE and pretend you're in them, going to the ocean.
7. If you hate the beach, you're safely surrounded by concrete, scaffolding, and pigeons.
6. The Hotel Le Jolie and its Grand Theft Auto IV banner. Viva le irony, and feel good about your rent: if you were living in the hotel, you'd be paying well over $8,000/month...for a nearly windowless room under the BQE.
5. Maria, Antoinetta, Armando, and the other aged people from the old country who sit on stoops, hang out laundry, grow tomatoes on concrete lots, and do not wear sneakers and skinny pants.
4. The Dance of the Giglio (one of just two sites in the city (the other being in East Harlem) where this happens, outside Italy). "Imagine a 12-piece brass band and 125 men carrying a five-ton, five-story, hand-sculpted tower on their shoulders, dancing it through their neighborhood in tempo to joyous Italian folk songs." The tower stands for much of July, surrounded by food stalls, a carousel, and other rides...particularly excellent for parishioners at Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, who can celebrate the betrayal and violent death of Christ and then enjoy a funnel cake.
3. 37.
2. Bamonte's, one of the oldest remaining restaurants in the city (it opened in 1900), patron saint of many stray cats, and the closest thing to the Soprano's on a Saturday night this side of the Hudson.
1. The chance to quiz friends on little-known parts of farm animals.